Reverse Storm Chasin' Part I

One word. Holymotherofgodwhattheefffwasthat. 

That one word describes my mindset when I finally pulled into my garage. I just outran (read: almost outran) one the worst thunderstorms in the history of this month. But I was finally home, safe. The kind of safe you feel when you are playing tag and you are in a dead sprint to home base and the older kid is chasing you down quick. When you finally tag the couch (home base), you get this sense of 'whew'ness. This is what I felt when I pulled in to my house. 

I was just chased by a surprise t-storm/tornado/hurricane/alien attack. It was nuts. Back to the beginning. As I was walking through the parking lot after work I thought 'Wow its getting dark pretty quickly'. Next thing I know, I am literally trying to out run this storm on the highway. 

*Timeout*

Ok speaking of Dallas highways, what the eff city planners? Your city has the worst road construction/layout I have ever seen. I wish I knew how to insert a picture so I could describe via MS Paint some of the horrendous road layouts. 

(Visual of a Dallas road clusterfuck)

And that is just the first part of my hatred for the Dallas highways. This is where you wonderful Dallas drivers come into the picture. Really Dallas drivers? Did you really learn how to drive from the Helen Keller Driving School? I mean come on. Quit texting. Quit putting on makeup. Quit driving like douchebags.

And while I am on the topic of douchebaggery, I got another taste of a dbag on the Dallas highways. This d was cruuuuisin in a PIMPED out Ford Focus. Yeah, I will pause while you wipe the soda off you keyboard that just came out of your nose. This dude had rims on his focus that could only have been meant for one of jay z's rap videos. Straight up. I bet he had on an affliction shirt too. Douchey McDoucherson was flyyying in and out of traffic. So of course I played the game where I tried to box him in and slow him down. Thank you Nascar 08 for teaching me this skill. 

*Timein*

Trash and debris is being pushed across the road. Cows could be seen being tossed around. I could have sworn I saw Dorothy and Toto fly by too. 

And this will end my story for tonight. I need to sleep and I dont know how to autosave this yet. I didn't mean to go on the highway tangent but its one of my hot buttons. 

This was just a tease. And if you are still reading, it gets waaaay better.